Mittwoch, 28. April 2010

You're still the best thing in my life..

I just read my last posts .. I posted them very long time ago.. In a time, in which everything was good, we we're so in love and happy :) but now, we aren't anymore.. I want to write from now on what I'm feeling..
I'm feeling so bad, I'm feeling.. can't explain it in words.. I made such stupid things.. I did everything wrong, I could .. Everything .. and still I never saw it.. I never saw that I was it, who made the mistakes, I was .. a terrible person.. I don't know how he could be so long in love with me.. I.. just, was like a monster to him, like somebody who wasn't me but somebody other, I hurt him so much.. I would go back and change everything, but I can't.. My behaviour was the last.. But I can't go back and change her either, so I only can show him now, that I'm nomore this roboter.. this monster.. that hurts everybody.. but I'm the one who loves him, who doesn't want to hurt him anymore.. but now he can't give me a chance anymore, I can understand it.. but I would be the happiest girl on earth, if he would give me one last chance, to show him that I love him an that everything could be just wonderful.. he's confusing me.. I love him.. Does he love me? Or doesn't he.. I'm so in love with him.. And I hope he'll love me too, someday.. I hope he can forget the bad things .. one day .. and just think about love .. think about getting happy.. I love you Steven.